Cuddle Party.

I had an old boss that used to want to have a cuddle party. It was her idea of a good time and team bonding experience. Basically, I think she wanted us all to lay around and stroke her ego. This fact describes so much of her personality. I think cuddle parties sound contrived and creepy.

Here are the rules for cuddle parties aka bullet points in support of my opinion:

1. Pajamas stay on the whole time.
2. You must ask permission and receive a verbal “yes” before you touch anyone. (Be as specific in your request as you can.)
3. You don’t have to cuddle anyone at a Cuddle Party, ever.
4. If you’re a yes, say yes. If you’re a no, say no.
5. If you’re a maybe, say no.
6. You are encouraged to change your mind from a yes to a no or a no to a yes anytime you want.
7. Respect your relationship agreements and communicate with your partner.
8. Get your Cuddle Lifeguard On Duty or Cuddle Caddy if you have a question or concern or need assistance with anything during the Cuddle Party.
9. Tears and laughter are both welcome.
10. Respect people’s privacy when sharing about Cuddle Party and do not gossip.
11. Arrive on time.
12. Be hygienically savvy.

I think my favorites are 'cuddle caddy' and 'hygenically savvy.' And to me, this sounds like rules for a self-help-swingers-fest à la gen x.

(painting by mike monteiro via the beholder.)